Valentine (2001)
Directed by Jamie Blanks
There was a short time in the late 90s to the early 2000s where slasher films had a resurgence. In that short time we were given movies like Scream, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and Urban Legend (Also directed by Blanks). Somewhere on the outside of that craze came Valentine. In February 2001 I was 14, and very much into the horror genre. I do not remember Valentine, AT ALL. So that kind of tells you how big of an impact this had. Hell the movie was made for $29M and only pulled in $36.7M. In recent years it has gained some notoriety and even had a scream factory blu ray release, which is impressive. I found this on Tubi (again a plug for that platform) so I was finally able to give it a view.
Valentine is about a group of women that have been friends since middle school. The movie opens up with a middle school dance where an awkward shy boy named Jeremy is asking each girl to dance, he is shot down in a variety of responses from disgust to disinterest. Jeremy is then tricked and tormented by a gang of bullies. The bullies strip him down and embarrass Jeremy in front of the whole school. Skip ahead 13 years later (YAY! Not the slasher favorite number of 10!) and the girls are being tormented by a killer in a cupid mask. Slowly the girls are hunted down, one by one and murdered. Can they figure out who the killer is? Is it Jeremy? Or is it someone else altogether?
The acting in this movie is ok. It isn’t bad but it is far from good. The cast is fairly decent, you get a few solid names from the time period. Denise Richards plays Paige, David Boreanaz plays Adam, Marley Shelton as Kate, Jessica Capshaw as Dorothy, Jessica Cauffiel as Lily, and Katherine Heigl as Shelley. This is probably peak Denise Richards, around the time of Wild Things where she was the hottest, and before she got involved with Charlie Sheen and his shenanigans. Boreanaz does a commendable job as Adam, the alcoholic love interest of Kate. You see a good variety of emotions from him, which can be hard to find in the slasher genre.
Unlike a lot of slasher movies the kills in this aren’t really all that spectacular. We get to see a stabbing, death by arrows, girl gets stomped on to glass shards in the throat, and power drill among a few others. Nothing too great, but the blood shed is fairly realistic, which is refreshing. A guy gets beaten to death with an iron which was odd, and probably the lamest of all the kills. The cupid mask is rather creepy and I wonder if it helped influence the baby mask in Happy Death Day? We are to assume the entire movie that Jeremy is the killer and what is his motive to kill these girls? He was turned down by them at a dance? Shit I guess I should hunt down every girl that rejected my goofy ass! Eh I don’t have enough time left in my life to do that, there were many haha. The premise is thin, to say the least but it wasn’t a bore and I’m shocked that this movie only has a 4.8 on IMDB, it was much better than that. The camera work was much of its time and nothing really stands out or makes it shine above the rest. The creepiest scene to me is where one girl is walking through a maze of monitors at an art exhibit and the screens start turning off. It builds up suspense but it’s too short! They should have spent the time, built up the tension and then went for the kill.
Valentine is a product of its time. The early 2000s and late 90s had a certain feel that is hard to explain. It tries to show some love for the heyday slashers of the early 80s but its approach is lacking in some spots, like the aforementioned monitor scene. The ending left something to be desired, and it is kind of a letdown altogether. I knew who the killer was probably 20 to 30 minutes into the movie, which is bad because I’m usually terrible at picking out the red herrings and finding the killer. While I don’t agree with the 4.8 rating on IMDB, Valentine isn’t a great movie. It succeeds in being a competent slasher but misses in a few areas to be considered a classic like Scream or even Urban Legend. Not sure if I’ll give this another watch but I enjoyed this. I give Valentine a B-.
31 Horror Movies 